Tuesday, March 31, 2009


It was so hard to go back to work today.
I had Friday and Monday off. I needed to recharge and D-crazy came up for a visit.
Great time reallllly great time. We talked alot. I needed that more then I realized. I dont have any friends other than her and its tough holding everything inside all the time. I let it all out and then some. So I felt better about everything. So when I walked into my cube back to work today I tried practicing what I preached. It was hard and it will take some time. All day I focused on myself and how I was feeling not worrying about what everyone else thought. When I got angry I growled to myself and just worked through it and then when done celebrated with a internal smile. I know sounds cheezy but I need to do it.
I still dont want to go back.
I want to sleep on the couch covered in blankets and my pup.
Why cant they pay me for that?

Sunday, March 22, 2009

I love ya tomorrow

So Mike left yesterday morning for his vacation. Last night was hard nothing in the bed with me. So at about 2 am I thought I would let Kiah out and up on the bed. A few hrs later I find my glasses destroyed in the living room. Funny thing is out of all the things in the house she could have destroyed she chose the same glasses Morgan destroyed when I was in college. So I have a feeling she is still around one way or another.
Today I am gonna work around the house and work on some quilts.

Monday, March 16, 2009

Morgan aka the boo dog

Adopted 6/1999
At peace 3/16/09
During her life she loved and was loved by friends and strangers alike. Known as the Walmart greeter dog she was always happy to say hello to everyone and bring a smile to their day. She is survived by her Mom and Dad, sister Kiah and partner in crime Bailey.
She is proceeded by Schnapps and some fish.
The family requests donations to be made to your local animal shelter in her memory.
She will never be forgotten.

The Journey
When you bring a pet into your life, you begin a journey - a journey that will bring you more love and devotion than you have ever known, yet also test your strength and courage.
If you allow, the journey will teach you many things, about life, about yourself, and most of all, about love. You will come away changed forever, for one soul cannot touch another without leaving its mark.
Along the way, you will learn much about savoring life's simple pleasures - jumping in leaves, snoozing in the sun, the joys of puddles, and even the satisfaction of a good scratch behind the ears.
If you spend much time outside, you will be taught how to truly experience every element, for no rock, leaf, or log will go unexamined, no rustling bush will be overlooked, and even the very air will be inhaled, pondered, and noted as being full of valuable information. Your pace may be slower - except when heading home to the food dish - but you will become a better naturalist, having been taught by an expert in the field.
Too many times we hike on automatic pilot, our goal being to complete the trail rather than enjoy the journey. We miss the details - the colorful mushrooms on the rotting log, the honeycomb in the old maple snag, the hawk feather caught on a twig. Once we walk as a dog does, we discover a whole new world. We stop; we browse the landscape, we kick over leaves, peek in tree holes, look up, down, all around. And we learn what any dog knows: that nature has created a marvelously complex world that is full of surprises, that each cycle of the seasons bring ever changing wonders, each day an essence all its own.
Even from indoors you will find yourself more attuned to the world around you. You will find yourself watching summer insects collecting on a screen. (How bizarre they are! How many kinds there are!), or noting the flick and flash of fireflies through the dark. You will stop to observe the swirling dance of windblown leaves, or sniff the air after a rain. It does not matter that there is no objective in this; the point is in the doing, in not letting life's most important details slip by.
You will find yourself doing silly things that your pet-less friends might not understand: spending thirty minutes in the grocery aisle looking for the cat food brand your feline must have, buying dog birthday treats, or driving around the block an extra time because your pet enjoys the ride. You will roll in the snow, wrestle with chewy toys, bounce little rubber balls till your eyes cross, and even run around the house trailing your bathrobe tie - with a cat in hot pursuit - all in the name of love.
Your house will become muddier and hairier. You will wear less dark clothing and buy more lint rollers. You may find dog biscuits in your pocket or purse, and feel the need to explain that an old plastic shopping bag adorns your living room rug because your cat loves the crinkly sound.
You will learn the true measure of love - the steadfast, undying kind that says, "It doesn't matter where we are or what we do, or how life treats us as long as we are together." Respect this always. It is the most precious gift any living soul can give another. You will not find it often among the human race.
And you will learn humility. The look in my dog's eyes often made me feel ashamed. Such joy and love at my presence. She saw not some flawed human who could be cross and stubborn, moody or rude, but only her wonderful companion. Or maybe she saw those things and dismissed them as mere human foibles, not worth considering, and so chose to love me anyway.
If you pay attention and learn well, when the journey is done, you will be not just a better person, but the person your pet always knew you to be - the one they were proud to call beloved friend.
I must caution you that this journey is not without pain. Like all paths of true love, the pain is part of loving. For as surely as the sun sets, one day your dear animal companion will follow a trail you cannot yet go down. And you will have to find the strength and love to let them go. A pet's time on earth is far too short - especially for those that love them. We borrow them, really, just for awhile, and during these brief years they are generous enough to give us all their love, every inch of their spirit and heart, until one day there is nothing left.
The cat that only yesterday was a kitten is all too soon old and frail and sleeping in the sun. The young pup of boundless energy wakes up stiff and lame, the muzzle now gray. Deep down we somehow always knew that this journey would end. We knew that if we gave our hearts they would be broken. But give them we must for it is all they ask in return. When the time comes, and the road curves ahead to a place we cannot see, we give one final gift and let them run on ahead - young and whole once more. "Godspeed, good friend," we say, until our journey comes full circle and our paths cross again.
Crystal Ward Kent

Sunday, March 15, 2009

A time to laugh a time to cry

A little over a month ago we adopted a new puppy Kiah. We both thought it was time to "grow the family". Turns out the family may not grow as we thought. My older dog Morgan isnt doing to well. We thought she was just pissed off at the new pup. I took her to the vet because her gums had lost their color and she just wasnt herself. They did some blood tests and found she had anemia (low red blood cell count 20 normal was 37-55). So we tried to figure out what may have caused it. Normally anemia is just a sign of something bigger going on beneath the surface. So we took some x-rays. Her spleen was slightly enlarged but the vet thought that it wasnt anything to be worried about, it was likely due to her having to pump out more RBC's. So we thought it was likely IMHA a condition where her body saw the RBC's as foreign bodies and was destroying them. Not good but treatable. We but her on a immunosupprecent Prednisone and an antibiotic. She has been on that for about a week. We saw the side affects from the meds start on Wednesday but we havent seen any improvements in her physically. In fact she is getting worse. We will be taking her in on Monday to see what is going on. It appears that her spleen is getting further enlarged and I am afraid it may rupture. Her personality is gone and she has trouble getting up and down from the bed and other furniture. This is my first pet and overall I think I am dealing with it pretty well. But when Mike came down this morning well lets just say I really hadn't thought he was that concerned until now. I think I have only seen him cry once or twice before. It really hit me then.
I am going to see if she is suffering. I dont see that she is in pain but she has always been strong a fighter. I want to do everything I can to make her better. I have a good chunk of money in the bank and I am not afraid to use it. But I dont want to feel like I do now every day without knowing if its helping her. That sounds so selfish, but seeing her like this compared to how she "normally" is I dont see how she cant be suffering. Mike has lost 2 dogs and he said he doesnt want to go through the false hope issues again. The ups and downs of them getting better just to get even worse is terrible. I wish I could be sure that there was nothing else we could do then I wouldnt feel so bad. I know were doing everything we can right now. I hope tomorrow the vet will tell us that either this is a normal reaction and we can keep fighting or that there isn't anything more we can do.
I am prepared to ask if the vet can come to the house to put her down. I cant stand to do it at the vet. I talked to Mike and told him that if its an option I want to donate her body to science. So were "ready". He leaves on a week vacation next Saturday so were going to have to make the decision this week. One way or another this is probably not going to be a good week for me. Send me some good mojo ok?

Sunday, March 8, 2009

Opinion Needed

I have a new idea for our Etsy shop.....
Button Fairy's
What do you think??

This one fits in a 6x9 bubble envelope. So its about 4.5 by 6 ish. I didnt measure them before I mailed them. I can do everything custom on these from the color of the "wings" and "tail" and I can also do other faces, button styles etc.
I like them and they are super easy to make.
If you like them how much should they go for??